Saturday 30 April 2016

OMG it's May already & I'm still where I was at the start of the year!!!

So it's the first of May, almost half way through the year and I have pretty much wasted the first 4 months. As in my weight is still where it was my fitness is a bit better thanks to hockey training but nowhere near where it should be!!

I am feeling like I am at a bit of a crossroads. I am trying to decide what is the next step????

Do I go against everything I have said and believe about healthy nutrition and weight loss and do the shake thing to give myself a kick start??

Or

Do I try to get back on the healthy eating & exercise bandwagon which I know works??

I think deep down I know that answer. I'm just thinking that the shakes will give me a kick start and get me going. I have also come across 28bysamwood which looks like a great program and maybe that's what I need to give me the kick start. It's like a mini version of 12wbt from what I can understand. It does exercise, food & mindfulness. Although the idea of the quick fix of the shakes is really appealing.

I kind of feel like May is my make or break month. I have a 12km fun run at the end of May. It's my birthday at the start of June so it's always nice to be feeling great for that. It's also now only 8 Months until my brothers wedding and I want to be looking and feeling great for that.

I really feel like once my eating and exercise are back on track everything else seems to work out and run smoothly. I am way off track with my PT course. My house is a disaster zone. Everything about being a mum just seems harder!!! But I know that a big part of all of that is that I don't have the energy because I haven't been eating properly or exercising regularly.

So time to make some decisions and set some goals..................

Tuesday 29 March 2016

Hello...................It's been a while.

Here we go again...................
I'm back blogging, I just had a bit of a look and I haven't blogged since August last year and even then I think I only blogged about 4 or 5 times all year. Lots has happened since then

We won our hockey premiership
Hubby and I went to Canada
I have 2 new Nephews
We became Odd Parents to one of them
I'm studying to become a Personal Trainer

And I have put back on ALL the weight that I worked so hard to lose. It has slowly happened over the last 12 months. A couple of kg here and there have all added up. I have to say it feels HORRIBLE!!!!

I must admit before I lost the weight I hadn't been smaller since I was a teenager so I was used to my fat and lived in a little bubble of not really realising how big I was. But now knowing how good I can look and more importantly feel I look at myself now and just feel shit. There's no other word for it. It's a horrible feeling. And it SHOULD be enough of a motivation to get my act together.

Well you would think so wouldn't you??? The truth is I will be good for a few days or a week and then BAM a couple of days not watching what I eat and no exercise and 2kg added to the scales. I set myself goals, realistic, achievable, goals and I almost reach them then BAM motivation is out the window.

Now I am at a real loss as to how to get back into the swing of things. I have my brothers wedding at the end of the year and that is my long term goal. I would love to look amazing for that. I already have a dress that I bought for a wedding last year but didn't fit into. It's a size 14 and beautiful.

But before that I really need to get my head back into the right place. That is my main struggle at the moment. I am loving my personal training course and I know that no one wants a fat PT but even that doesn't seem to stop me from going to the fridge or sitting on the couch instead of exercising. I set myself a goal of being 97kg by the end of march. Pfft I was going well got down to 100.3kg but then old habits crept back in AGAIN!!!!

Whilst I realise the number on the scales are not the be all and end all. It's not just about the numbers it's about the clothes that don't fit, the red marks on your tummy from tight jeans, the bras that leave back fat and are so tight you can't wait to get them off, not being able to bend over comfortably to tie up your shoe laces, not being able to run more then 3km, a sore back, no strength, not keeping up at hockey training,  I could go on & on.

I'm not going to make any huge bold statements on here and set all these goals that I may or may not reach. What I will do is promise to keep the blogging up. The good, the bad & the ugly. The first ugly bit I will share is what the scales said this morning.

103.6kg